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2010 Shula Endrey-Walder (Rosenfeld)

2010 NSW Betar Fundraiser

2009 Site Visitor Report

Where's Menachem??

'New' old Camp Photos

A letter from the Briggs

Lizzie K's Secret Stash of Photos

2008 Site Visitor Report

Betar Melbourne sells Maon

Remember me? Lizzie Kornhaber

Remember me? Pamela Orr

2007 Site Visitor Report

Happy Birthday, Sam Offman

Brian Rudzki

Adam Graycar

2006 Site Visitor Report

Paul Gottlieb

Larry Sitsky Portrait

Brisbane Betar's 50th Anniversary

John Goldlust

Rodney Gouttman

Sam Parasol - OAM

Shoshanna Jordan's Exhibition

'Bible Stories' vs. 'It's a Lie'

2004 Site Visitor Report

Other News Articles

 

 

 

Jan 26, 2010: Shula ENDREY-WALDER (Rosenfeld) Honoured with an OAM

Medal of the Order of Australia

For service to the community through raising awareness of Tay-Sachs Disease and as the Co-Founder of Gift of Life Australia.

Volunteer, Tay-Sachs Disease Community Genetics Screening Program, since 1998; the program screens children and young adults’ carrier status for the Tay-Sachs Disease, an hereditary disorder of lipid metabolism which occurs most frequently in individuals of Eastern European Jewish ancestry and those with French-Canadian ancestry.

Co-Founder, Gift of Life Australia, 2006.

The Gift of Life Australia’s mission is to raise awareness about the lifesaving potential of Stem Cell, Bone Marrow and Cord Blood transplants and to recruit potential donors, particularly those from ethnic minorities, to the Australian Bone Marrow Donor Registry.

In 1994, Mrs Endrey-Walder set up a clinic on Sunday mornings at the Wolper Jewish Hospital to take blood samples from people willing to join the Australian Bone Marrow Donor Registry, raising awareness about the issue and facilitating the enrolment of over 5,000 Jewish donors.

Member, Board of Management, Wolper Jewish Hospital, since 1996.

Coordinator, Scarba Volunteer Family Fund, since 1999, under the umbrella of The Benevolent Society; assists underprivileged children, mothers-at-risk and families-in-crisis.

Volunteer at Our Big Kitchen project; a Sydney Yeshiva program.

Shula Andrey-Walder was in San Francisco attending her nephew’s Barmitzvah when she heard the news. She told J-Wire this morning: “I just got back yesterday. It was a really strange experience not being able to share this wonderful moment with my family and friends in the U.S. but like all other honorees, I had to remain silent until the appropriate time. I love Australia and I feel deeply honored.”

 

Reprinted from J-Wire

 

 

 

Jan 26, 2010: Fundraising Cocktail Party to aid Betar NSW

 

The P&F of Betar NSW is holding a spectacular cocktail party on Tuesday Evening January 26 2010.

It's being held in a fabulous home in Dover Heights with spectacular views over the harbour sunset and fireworks.  Kosher fine cuisine and most liquor and refreshments are included in the price.  There'll be live and recorded background music.  Hopefully there will also be a video hookup with some olim.  You'll get to meet the new Mefakedet of Betar Sydney.  And most important, you'll get together with old friends and make some new ones at the same time.

We'll be sending out invitations in the next few days.  Numbers are absolutely limited to about 100 guests, so you'll need to get your RSVP in as soon as possible, once you get your invitation. 

If you want to be invited but you are not sure if you are on our mailing list, please email us urgently with your full contact details including your postal address, and give us the details of anyone else you want us to invite.  Let others know about this too.

This is the first fund-raiser of the 2010 year and will be unforgettable.  This year will be a very exciting one for the movement.

We are raising money toward four major Betar expenses:
 

  • purchase of a maon (we already have much of the funding for this, but not all)

  • funding the next shaliach (Ari and Shuli Briggs finish their very successful shlichut in August)

  • ongoing maintenance of the soon-to-be-bought maon

  • subsidies for those Betar leaders who cannot otherwise afford to go on Shnat (Machon) - costs are now up around $30,000 per participant!
     

We'll need help from those of you who are able to contribute.

But this new Betar Parents & Friends is not simply interested in raising money: 
 

  • We are looking to reconnect with our fellow Betarim, across decades of friendships, through functions of all types; 
     

  • We'll be working with the current leadership of Betar, to fill gaps in their knowledge and help them in areas where they are looking for special expertise; 
     

  • And we'll be providing continuity where requested by the movement, from one generation of leadership to the next.

Hoping to get to know you all.

Tel 'Hai
תל חי

Warren Marshall
President,
Parents and Friends of Betar NSW

pnfnsw@betar.org.au
 

 

2009 Site Visitor Report

 

 

  

 

 

 

Where's Menachem??

 

 

 

 

'New' old Camp Photos

 

 

Thanks to Avram Appel for cleaning out his drawers.

 

 

 

A letter from the Briggs

 

G’day Henry and Miriam: I am currently updating our web site at www.162smilingfaces.com.

May I assume that Ari is your son? Just need to make sure before I post an article. - Harry

You bet!!! Ari ( A.K.A. Lionel ) is ours!!!!

Deborah our eldest lives with her French Husband "Jean" & 4 daughters in Moddi'in & has been in Israel for 18 years.

Ari, our older son, lives in Ra'anana with his Betar companion/wife Shuli & their 5 sons & also have done so for about 15 years. He is currently giving back to the movement & Jewish Community that made him what he is today, some of what he has learnt & become. In other words he's the current Betar Shaliach- in Oz,-since January this year for the next two years!!!

Our younger two children live in Oz still -- Naomi & her son Benji. And Simon, his South African, Moriah College educated wife Lauren and their one daughter & two sons also live in Oz.

So you can see we are very blessed with 13 Grandchildren, (T.G.) whom my Mother, who is still "hale & hearty "at the age of 92, enjoys very much!!! Including my brother David Destons' grandchildren my mother has 18 Great Grandchildren!! (CHAI).

Nice to be able to qvell a little!!!

All the best, Miriam & Henry Briggs

 

 

 

Lizzie K's Secret Stash of Photos

 

 

 

Here are some pictures I managed to get scanned. I'm not very good with modern technology. In order, I'll list the names and years. Take what you want from these, I could not separate them, my body maybe 65, but my mind is still only about 22,  sound familiar?

 

 

2008 Site Visitor Report

 

 

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Betar Melbourne sells Maon - July 2008

 

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Remember Me? - Lizzie Kornhaber

I do not know if you remember me, Lizzie Schneider from Sydney. Michael Price was over here for lunch the other day and I was showing him my old photos of us at different camps way back.

When I can get someone  to show me how.... I will send them to you....In the meantime, here's this!

I have a passion for classic cars and own several, as well as rally them and sometimes on the track with other of the same ilk...

So here is one of me with my MG TC 1948, The car is younger than me.....and two years ago crossing the Nullabor on a rally in 1969 XJ6...... I must admit for a good Jewish girl, I have an unusual hobby, but it keeps me young and meet people from all over the world..............

Lizzie Kornhaber (Schneider)

Remember Me? - Pamela Orr

I guess I'm just that little bit younger than some of you lot, not a bad thing these days....... I was in the Kana'im group in the late fifties. I attended Betar with my schoolfriends, Millie Savdie (deceased about 20 years ago), and Di and Debbie de Berg. I attended two camps, one at Commodore Heights; the other I have forgotten where, although I also did attend another camp(let) at Springwood at the foot hills of the Blue Mountains.

Ruminations....Danny Rosing was head serang, and the Kana'im leader was Chava [VK - Weissberger]. Eddie Adamek, a year younger than me, is my brother-in -law' brother. He was in the other Kana'im group.

Pamela Orr

 

2007 Site Visitor Report

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Happy Birthday, Sam Offman

August 2007

Dear Sam,

We have all known each other for 50 years or more; so, even though we remember you as a sprightly, red-headed teenager, it should not come as a surprise that you are now also 70 years old. Human nature being what it is, we tend to forget that our friends also grow older.

Looking at it the opposite way, we are reminded of the story of a bloke our age who goes to a new dentist, looks at his nameplate and remembers someone by that name who had been in his class in school.

When he sees him, he says, “weren’t you in my class in Primary school”?

Could be, answers the dentist, “what did you teach”?

We wish you Sam, a very happy 70th birthday, health and well being.

One piece of advice, from some of your old friends::

Never, under any circumstances, take a sleeping pill and a laxative on the same night.

In long and lasting friendship,

Tel Hai,

Your Betar friends in Israel

Rosette & Jack Mirjam

Danny & Heather Rosing

Leah Feder

Shim & Perla Feder

Yosef & Dora Steiner

Miki Golovesky

Theo & Anat Balbaritzki

Solly & Rosalie Goldstein

Henry & Ros Ben-Ezra (Bish)

Shimon Addess

Frida Sheiner (Goldstein)

 

Hi Sam Offman

As the old song says, Happy Biffday to you, may you never feel blue, ying tong ying tong billabong, happy biffday to ye. spend it happily, ying tong ying tong billabong. Now all together Betarim for young Sam, Ying Tong Ying Tong Billabong. Biffday is the signal t

keep on biffing away at life regardless. Cheers from Jerusalem, Alex Auswaks

Alex Auswaks

 

And your Betar friends in the Unites States

Harry & Elaine Stuart

 

And your friends from Australia

Hard to imagine what one can say to an old friend at this stage of his life

Am not even sure you remembers me,

all the same

I would like to forward to you, that I will always remember you

as you were many years ago.

And to tell you that I had a mad crush on you then.

Wish you A HAPPY BIRTHDAY.......

I am thinking about you & hope that you can look back on your life on all the wonderful things you have achieved and accomplished.

Fondest regards Judy Hirsch (Wabnik) Melbourne

Vernon Kronenberg, Canberra

Anne & Rodney Goutman. Melbourne

DEAR SAM- FROM A FELLER MEMbER OF THE "aLTE kACHES cLUB!" i ALSO REMEMBER WELL YOUR RED HAIR AND TEMPERAMENT SOMEWHAT TO MATCH.... NOT TO MENTION YOUR KEEN SUPPORT OF CARLTON, IN THE AFL. YOU CANNOT EXAGGERATE THE SUPPORT, THESE DAYS, FOR THE "LOCAL" TEAM, THE SWANS. i ALSO REMEMBER, MANY MOONS AGO, YOUR HOSPITALITY IN PUTTING ME UP IN MELBOURNE. MY BEST AND MOST SINCERE WISHES TO YOU AT THIS TIME OF TSURES. REMEMBER THAT YOU ARE IN OUR POSITIVE THOUGHTS FOR YOU, AND, WHILE NO LONGER ROOTING FOR ENGLAND, i AM ROOTING FOR YOU! wARM REGARDS,

PETER WAGNER.

Brian Rudzki

Rudzki Takes Charge at St. Kilda Shul

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Adam Graycar

Australian criminology scholar appointed dean of School of Criminal Justice
By Helen Paxton

 

Adam Graycar

President Richard L. McCormick has announced the appointment of the distinguished Australian public official and criminal justice scholar Adam Graycar as dean of the School of Criminal Justice at Rutgers-Newark. The appointment is effective July 1, 2007.

Leslie Kennedy, who served as dean of the school for nine years, will continue at Rutgers as a member of the faculty.
“We look forward to welcoming Adam Graycar to lead the School of Criminal Justice at Rutgers-Newark,” said R-N Provost Steven J. Diner. “Graycar will bring a unique and exciting new perspective and provide exceptional leadership to one of Rutgers’ most renowned schools.”

Since 2003 Graycar has served as Head of the Cabinet Office for the Government of South Australia, a civil service post which oversees the whole of government policies and activities and advises on broad-ranging topics of government policy, development and implementation. He also leads his state’s activities in federal and state negotiations.

Prior to assuming the Cabinet Office position, Graycar held a variety of posts in public service and academia. These have included director of the Australian Institute of Criminology, a federal government statutory authority (1994-2003); CEO of the Ministry of Higher Education; and executive director of the Department of Employment, Training and Further Education for the Government of South Australia (1990-1994); Australian Commissioner for the Aging (1985-1990). His academic posts were in the fields of social policy and political science at universities in Adelaide and Sydney, Australia.

Graycar is a widely published expert on many aspects of criminal justice and social issues, with a record of numerous books, book chapters and journal articles. He is also the recipient of many awards and honors, including election in 1998 as a fellow of the Academy of the Social Sciences in Australia.

He received a bachelor’s degree with honors in political science from the University of New South Wales in Sydney, Australia, and went on to complete a Ph.D. in Public Policy and a D. Litt (Doctor of Letters) in Social Policy from the same institution. Over the years he has been a member or chair of many boards and committees, government and nongovernment, in Australia and internationally. For the past four years he has served as a member of the board of the Australian Bureau of Statistics, Australia's national census and statistics agency.

Having spent his entire career in Australia, with frequent study trips abroad, Graycar will be taking on a new career role as dean at an American university. “The Northeastern U.S. is just about as far from Adelaide, Australia, that one can get and still be on the planet,” he said. “Taking on the deanship of the Rutgers School of Criminal Justice is a wonderful opportunity to share ideas and educational endeavors across international borders, and offer leadership in a field rich in local as well as global issues.”

Graycar said that technological change has emphasized that crime knows no boundaries. “Growth areas of global concern include identity fraud, cyber and other high-tech crimes, new forms of money laundering, crime related to environmental challenges, and new criminal opportunities that are created with widespread demographic change,” he said. “I look forward immensely to working in the academic environment in which we can explore and learn in-depth about the underlying causes of criminal behavior and the solutions to persistent as well as new challenges in criminal justice.”

The Rutgers School of Criminal Justice (RSCJ) was established at Rutgers University in 1972 by the New Jersey State Legislature, which recognized the need for a formal<> program of study dedicated to preparing students to be leaders in research, teaching and public policy to better address criminal justice issues. More than three decades later, the impact and influence of the school are respected internationally, and RSCJ is ranked as one of the top criminal justice schools in the nation.

The school offers a bachelor’s degree in criminal justice (in partnership with the College of Arts and Sciences), as well as master’s and doctoral degrees. The doctoral program in criminology is ranked fourth in the nation by U.S. News & World Report’s Best Graduate Schools.

2006 Site Visitor Report

 

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Paul Gottlieb

Paul Gottlieb

Paul Gottlieb

Mr Paul Gottlieb AM, Chief Technical Officer, Intellection Pty Ltd, Queensland
While an experimental scientist at CSIRO Port Melbourne in the early 1980s, Paul Gottlieb helped create a prototype analysis system for measuring mineral composition in plant and ore samples. Employing a comprehensive understanding of physics, mineralogy and statistics, the QEM*SEM (Quantitative Evaluation of Minerals by Scanning Electron Microscopy) allowed technicians to rapidly identify and measure the distribution of minerals within samples.

Right from the start the system was more than a scientific tool - it was used to solve industrial problems and the commercial possibilities of QEM*SEM were apparent. Paul set about converting the analogue prototype to computer control and digital image processing. A laboratory fire at Port Melbourne allowed Paul to completely redesign the system. Soon after, development was transferred to CSIRO Clayton and it was there that the world's first commercial quantitative mineralogical analysis system was built. The first production system was sold to the University of Minnesota. A second system was purchased soon after by a South African mining company and Paul and his team were soon in demand to tune and modify the units, so that metallurgists could have accurate information to improve mineral grade and recovery in mineral processing plants.

While Paul and his team refined QEM*SEM, CSIRO suffered budget problems and key staff were lost to industry. With unflagging dedication Paul managed his design team, installed and promoted QEM*SEM around the world and organised user workshops and training sessions for its use. By the mid-1990s, Paul had developed a new generation system known as QEMSCAN based on PC control, and while riding an industry downturn he received the 1997 CSIRO Medal and the 1999 Sir Ian McLennan Industry Achievement Award for his contribution to Australian industry.

In 2003, CSIRO created a spin-off company, Intellection Pty Ltd, to market QEMSCAN. Paul became Chief Technology Officer. Today's QEMSCAN allows 12,000 mineral analyses per minute, with such accuracy that base and precious metal users have reported dramatic process improvement benefits. Platinum and gold producers are able to measure minerals present in ores as low as 1 part per million. CSIRO estimates the worldwide industry benefit of the system to be greater than $200M per year. QEMSCAN has also been successfully applied to the oil and gas industry, coal, fly ash, building materials, soil, environmental, and forensic investigations - and Paul is still refining it and finding new applications.

In further recognition of his endeavours, Paul was made a Member of the Order of Australia in 2006.

Larry Sitsky Portrait

On Monday 9 October 2006 there was an official showing of the latest Larry Sitsky portrait, made by a local Canberra artist, at the Australian National University's School of Music. Photographer: Vernon Kronenberg.

Larry Sitsky and Larry Sitsky

Artist and Larry Sitsky

The Portrait

 

Brisbane Betar's 50th Anniversary

 

Dear John and Harry,

My name is Ben Klug and I am the Mefaked of Betar Queensland. This year we are celebrating the 50th Anniversary of Betar Queensland, and I found your wonderful internet site while searching for information. I would love to hear from you and if you have any information/photos/stories about Betar Queensland that would be fantastic. I hope these email addresses are still in use.

Kind Regards, Tel Hai, Ben Klug.

Ben Klug

Mefaked Betar Queensland 2006

Editor's note: Please correspond with Ben directly at ben_klug@hotmail.com

 

Hi Harry,

Thank-you so much for your fast reply, and for passing the email on for me. I really appreciate it.

We are planning on having the reunion around the end of October and want to invite as many old Betarim as possible. I will definitely give you the final details to publish on the site as well as photos, after the event.

if you have anything specific that you think should be mentioned or anything you know about Betar Queensland in the pass i would really appreciate it. Even if it is to just say hello to a few people- madrichim or chanichim of yours that are still in Brisbane.

I really like the site and think it is a great idea! I would also like to ask your permission to put some of the photos in a slide show for the evening?

Goodluck with the move, and I will keep you informed of how the plans progress.

Once again thank-you very much

Tel Chai,

Tara Avrahami

 

Shalom Tara,

I have spent some time at night in this very hot summer trying, in my mind, to work out what to write.

Firstly people to email: Lewis Trigger and David Zavelsky is oldest brother of Philip Zavelsky and others in that family. I understand he lives in Israel. They may be able to help you.

The people with whom I had contact, or should I say contacted me, to start Betar in Brisbane include people living here with whom you should make contact - Danny and Heather Rosing. Danny was the head of Betar in Australia. Heather (nee Cohen) came to Brisbane with the late Naomi Kronenberg (Kessler) to encourage me to get involved in the beginnings of Betar in Brisbane.

The Brisbane people who influenced me into starting Betar in Brisbane were the late Al Goldberg, then President of the State Zionist Council of Queensland, and his son Alec Goldberg who, if I remember correctly, now lives in Sydney. Alec later moved to Canberra from Brisbane and had a bit to do with Betar's operations there - as did Victor Young when he moved from Brisbane.

It was decided by the Zionist youth movements that, in smaller communities, there would be just one Zionist youth movement. Therefore for example Perth, I think, has/had Habonim. Brisbane was given Betar. Some people objected to this organisation as, back then, anything connected with Herut, Israel's right-wing political party was very much out of favour. As the Goldbergs and others came to Australia from China where Betar had been very popular they backed the move.

There had been a machonik from Brisbane before that but I don't remember what he did. He had been involved, I think, with Habonim - not Betar. That was the late Arnold Newhouse. Arnold died recently in Sydney.

There was no youth movement in Brisbane at the time and something Jewish was needed for the community's youth. I was teaching at the cheder (Sunday school) at the synagogue in Margaret Street and stayed on after that and so did those who became involved. We had lunch and then had our Betar meeting. From memory there were Chashmonaim - the younger group, and Kanaim - up to about age 15. (I could be wrong.)

I remember being involved in local camps - with the mothers of campers - such as Miriam Ochert being the cooks in the kitchen, and Morris Ochert being there too!!!

I did attend Kenes Artzi in Sydney at least once and, later following my return from Israel, Kenes Artzi in Melbourne. I do remember taking Brisbane children to the Sydney camp - by train overnight, in the summer of 1960-61 before I went on Machon.

The people who were madrichim while I was running Betar in Brisbane included Brian Grayson (I don't know where he is.), David Bennett and the late Regina List .

When I left for machon people such as Brian and David took over the two groups running at the time. When I returned from machon I decided I should not interfere with what they had built up so I set up a group for older Betarim - Bnei Etzel. We met Erev Shabbat at my home where I lived with my mother. (I, by the way, came home at the beginning of October when my father died.) This group lasted a few years, I think. The result, for me, was my marrying Mervyn Doobov, a regular participant in the group.

While I was involved with Betar I remember participating in the State Zionist Council of Queensland while Al Goldberg was the president.

I know I got satisfaction from doing something constructive in the Brisbane Jewish community into which I had been born and which had accepted my parents and brother who arrived in Australia from Germany immediately prior to Word War II. I also know that when we moved to Canberra, an even smaller Jewish community, Mervyn and I were more likely to do things in and for the community than others from Sydney and Melbourne, because we knew that if you wanted something to happen in a community you needed to do it.

I will look in old photo albums for photos and, if possible, somehow send them to you. Can they be faxed somewhere? Maybe when I look at the photos I will think of something else to say.

All the very best to all of you,

Sue Doobov (nee Gans)

P.S. My brother, older than me, is Alfred Gans who is either treasurer or auditor for organisations within the community. He left Brisbane long before Betar was established.

P.P.S. Ben Klug - Say hello to your grandparents who were friends of my parents

 

Editors note: various email addresses have been withheld in this correspondence.

 

John Goldlust

Unravelling Identity: Immigrants, Identity and Citizenship in Australia

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Rodney Gouttman

ANZAC Zionist Hero Hailed in New Book

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Sam Parasol - OAM

Double Celebration for Maccabi stalwart

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Shoshanna Jordan's Exhibition

 

'Bible Stories' vs. 'It's a Lie'

From Sid Agranoff comes this response:

Dear Harry,

The song was sung in Betar Sydney using other words, which were later found in the 1960 Sydney University song book. We learnt it from Peter Wagner, but I think it must have had its origin in Melbourne Betar, because the words "Pilsener Lager beer" in one of the verses was sung then as "Foster Lager beer"  and at that time Fosters, a Melbourne brewery, was not known in Sydney.

The South African version was in the Australian Betar song book of 1960.

[But] it's the Sydney Uni version that I still remember and sing to myself from time to time.

Regards,

Sid Agranoff

Bible Stories

Adam was the first man, so we all believe,

One morning he was filleted and introduced to Eve;

He had no one to show him, but he soon found out the way—

And that’s the only reason that we’re standing here today.

 

CHORUS:

 

Young soaks, old soaks, everybody come,

To our little Sunday school and have a tot of rum.

There’s a place to check your chewing gum and razors at the door,

And we’ll tell you Bible stories that you’ve never heard before.

 

Pharoah had a daughter with a most bewitching smile,

She found the infant Moses in the rushes by the Nile.

She took him home to dear papa, and he believed the tale—

Which is just about as probable as Jonah and the whale.

 

Moses was the leader of the Israelitic flock,

He used to get spa water just by striking on a rock;

Then one day from the multitude there came a mighty cheer,

For instead of getting water he got Pilsener Lager beer.

 

Solomon and David led very wicked lives,

They used to spend their afternoons with other people’s wives,

And then in the evenings when conscience gave them qualms,

Solomon wrote the proverbs and David wrote the psalms.

 

Jonah was a mariner, so goes the ancient tale,

Who booked a steerage passage on a transatlantic whale,

When the atmospheric pressure grew too heavy on his chest,

Jonah pressed the button and the whale did the rest.

 

Samson was a fighter of the very highest class,

He slew 40,000 Philistines with the jaw-bone of an ass,

The roof fell in one day when he leaned upon a pillar.

And this then was the end of Sam and lady-friend Delilah.

 

Salome was a lady of abbreviated skirt,

She invited John the Baptist to a harmless little flirt.

But Johnny was a wowser and wouldn’t grant her wish,

So she sent him up to Heaven with his head upon a dish.

 

Note: The above comes from The University of Sydney song book, 1960, and it is the version we sang in Betar Sydney. It was taught [to] us by Peter Wagner.

 

The version [below - as outlined in the response from the Loyal Reader] comes from the Betar song book of June 1960 and is probably South African Betar in origin.  

 

Note: The chorus in my copy of the song book seems wrong. It doesn’t seem to fit and may be from another song. It goes:

 

It’s a lie, it’s a lie,

For you know you’re telling a lie,

You blighter,

You know you’re telling a lie

 

The words of the song from the South African song book

From a Loyal Reader comes this response:

This is from the old South African song book.

We may have used a different chorus here in the land of Oz. I have a vague recollection of-

Old souls, young souls, Everybody come

To our little Sunday School, And have a tot of rum.

- as quoted by Avraham ........ and no recollection of ......... It's a lie ....... etc. But who knows? It was a hell of a long time ago!

===========================================================

IT'S A LIE

Chorus:

It's a lie, it's a lie,

For you know you're telling a lie,

You blighter,

You know you're telling a lie.

 

ADAM was the first man and he lived all alone,

Till Eve was manufactured out of Adam's funny bone.

Then after that old Adam had no cause to fret and grieve,

Rising early in the morning and settling down with Eve.

 

ADAM was the first man and Eve was next of kin.

Satan was a bad man, and tempted them to sin.

When Adam married Eve, he made a hell-of-a-slip,

For Eve got the apple, and Adam got the pip.

 

ADAM was a gardener and Eve his gentle spouse,

They got the sack for stealing fruit so they took to keeping house

It was a very simple life, was peaceful in the main,

Until they had a baby boy, and started raising Cain.

 

ESAU was a cow-boy from the wild and woolly-west,

His father left him half the farm and his brother Jake the rest.

But Esau thought the title deeds were very far from clear,

So he sold the whole kaboodle for a sandwich and a beer.

 

MOSES was a foundling whom his Ma one day forsook,

Was found by Pharoah's daughter as she took her morning dook.

She took him to her Pa and said, "I found him on the shore."

But Pharoah winked his eye and said, "I've heard that one before."

 

SAMSON was a bruiser of the Jeffery Johnson school,

He killed ten-thousand Phillistines with the jawbone of a mule.

Then up came Delilah, she filled him up with gin,

And she left him in the gutter, where the coppers ran him in.

 

SAMSON was a strong man, was walking down the path,

When he met a hungry lion coming from its morning bath.

He put his hand right down its throat, and so the people say,

When he turned it inside out, it ran the other way.

 

DANIEL was a bad boy and would not obey the King,

His Majesty remarked he would not stand for that sort of thing.

He put him down a man-hole with red lions down beneath,

But Daniel was a dentist and he pulled the lions' teeth.

 

ELIJAH was a prophet who attended all the fairs,

With a box of patent medicine and a troupe of dancing bears.

All prophesied successfully most every afternoon,

And he went up in the evenings in his patent fire-balloon.

 

SHADRACH was a prophet who was chucked into the fire,

Was expected by the stokers to immediately expire.

But when they opened the furnace, the asbestos laddie laughed

And said, "My hearties, keep it shut, I cannot stand the draught."

 

SOLOMON with David lead immoral lives,

Going about and flirting with other peoples' wives,

Until one day their consciences began to gives them qualms,

So Solomon wrote the proverbs and David wrote the psalms.

 

JONAH was a mariner who dearly loved to sail.

He booked an ocean passage on a Trans-Atlantic whale.

But when the fishy diet grew too heavy on his chest,

Jonah pressed the button and the whale did the rest.

2004 Site Visitor Report

The number of visitors/month keeps increasing - but some of their origins are surprising...

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Other News Articles

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